God's Quill

Before I go ahead to give you practical ways you also can stop embarrassing yourself whenever you're given an opportunity to go on stage, it is important to first establish one crucial point. Confidence is not a personality trait, it is a choice you make! Even your mentors and celebrities wake up on some days not feeling like it. Everyone has those days. I said this to say that the idea of appearing or becoming more confident is absolutely possible.  You just have to make the choice to change. I'll tell you a quick secret: Confidence is really just pretending until it no longer feels like you're pretending.  Yep! The most confident people are simply the best pretenders. Listen, no one is really exempted from facing the nerve-wracking fear that comes with going on stage or speaking up.  The only difference between you and those who seem better at this is they have mastered the art of pretense. You too can master speaking even when you're nervous. You just need to know ho...

  As a psychologist, I am cultured to believe that people's actions are based on something deeper than just mere preference—although the preference still counts. So the other day I was thinking, have you ever observed that in a classroom, a seminar, or even a church, the front seats are almost always empty?  People pile into the back rows like it's the only safe zone, leaving the front row awkwardly vacant.   Why does this happen? Is it just a habit, or is something deeper going on?   I did my research and I found some reasons why Let's explore some of those reasons… ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1. Fear of Being Watched (The Spotlight Effect) One major reason people avoid the front is a cognitive bias called the spotlight effect .  This is when we overestimate how much people are paying attention to us.   Sitting in front feels like stepping onto a stage like every move we make is being an...

I discovered over time that it wasn't a mere coincidence I always gravitated towards “powerful female characters” , you know the tough, feared, strong, sharp ones.…whether they were villains or not…they were always so appealing to me. The cute girls, girly girls, soft girls etc hardly ever appealed to me and in no time, I realized why…(story for another day) The characters we love often reflect parts of ourselves—our values, hidden desires, fears, or even qualities we wish we had.   For you it may be the rebellious underdog, the wise mentor, or the misunderstood antihero…. Regardless of what you like, my point is it is more than just a random preference. Who you like in a movie reveals something deeper about who you are. Let’s break it down.   Why Do We Connect with Certain Characters? 1. The Mirror Effect: Seeing Ourselves in Them There’s a psychological concept called the “ identification theory”, which suggests that we unconsciously connect with characters who ...